It was a dark and windy night as I stepped out of the theatre, still mesmerised by the high-voltage, supercharged action sequences I had seen Chris Hemsworth perform in Thor: Ragnarok. With my ever-present Thums Up can by my side, as I drove home, visions of Hemsworth not suitable for description to a family audience seemed to occupy most of my thoughts (sigh!).
I came home compelled by an urge for a Thor marathon (with my trusty Thums Up by my side). Somewhere in the middle of Thor kicking Dark Elf behind and sending Malekith back to Svartalfheim in The Dark World, I found myself slipping into a reverie and making my way to a subsequent REM (rapid eye movement) stage rather quickly.
I was awakened by a reverberating flash of thunder and found myself travelling- no- flying- through a rainbow coloured bridge, which seemed eerily similar to the Bifrost. My flight ended rather abruptly, and I found myself face down at the feet of a godly-looking man with rather alarmingly large golden horns on his head.
“Heimdall?!” I questioned, feeling rather stupid (I mean surely, reason would point to perhaps a fancy dress competition or play rather than me lying at the feet of a Norse god).
“You were expecting maybe Bilgesnipe?” he roared back. Visions of a large, mean-looking creature with terrifying antlers flashed before my eyes. I shuddered at the thought. The Bilgesnipe reference sealed it- I was definitely, somehow in Asgard!
“He he,” I laughed nervously, “I seemed to have somehow found my way through the Bifrost and into Asgard. Need to cut down on those anxiety pills, I expect. Terribly sorry for the slip up ol’ chap, err, possible that you send me back to Earth and we forget the whole thing happened? How about a shake on it, there’s a good lad?”
Didn’t work- expect it didn’t help that I tried to bribe an Asgardian with a 500 Re note folded into my extended hand.
“Now that you have come here, you must face Thor. He will decide your fate.”
Now THAT didn’t sound like a bad proposition at all, quite frankly! I rather fancied the old (by Earthly standards) boy, as you know. A real date sounded very agreeable indeed!
“Alright, if you must insist,” (play it cool, I told myself- hard to get) “Take me to him.”
I promptly found myself face down again, at a different yet equally large set of feet once more. I can’t say I care very much for the modes of transportation these Asgardians use. I looked up and opened my mouth to express my indignation at this most undignified tossing about of extra-terrestrials, when my eyes met his!
Sigh! There he was- all 6 foot 3 inches of muscle! Golden hair gleaming in the light, deep blue eyes looking back at me- rather amusedly I must confess.
Not to be intimidated, I got up to show my full 5 foot 4 inch frame, which next to him quite frankly, did seem a bit comical.
“Hello there! And where did you come from?” he asked in that heavenly baritone voice. I tried my best not to swoon.
“I am Richa, daughter of Sharma, from Earth,” I retorted, terribly weak in the knees suddenly. “I come here meaning no harm.” Harm? Did I just assure Thor the God of Thunder that I mean him no HARM?!
“I am aware, little one,” he smiled, “You have wandered into the Bifrost quite unintentionally. I am going to pay our old friend Surtur a visit and claim his crown; for if he were to unite his crown with the Eternal Flame, Asgard would be destroyed in the Ragnarok. Care to come along and watch?”
Visit Surtur? Ragnarok? Wait a minute; this was the beginning of the Ragnarok movie! I should warn him about the coming of Hella and how only Ragnarok can stop her!
“Wait a minute ol’ chap. Have I got a story for you!”
He stood in silence as I narrated the tale. At the end of it, he put his hand on my shoulder (mental note: do NOT wash shoulder for a week at least)
“You have given me wise counsel, little one. I will heed by your words. Tell me, what is it you want in return for this kindness?”
I looked around and suddenly found that I was still holding onto my can of Thums Up.
“Err, perhaps you could put more thunder in my drink? It’s my favourite and every time I sip it, I would think of you!”
He raised his hammer and about a zillion volts of lightning came out of it. He pointed it at my can which suddenly changed colour from blue to black!
“Granted, little one, now be gone to your planet, daughter of Sharma.”
I jumped out of bed screaming like a banshee. My mother rushed into my room.
“Are you quite alright?” she asked.
It was a dream. Oh boy- it had felt so real! It took me a few minutes to come out of Asgard and back to Earth, but somehow I shook it off.
“Nothing Mumsy, just a dream,” I assured her as she eyed me suspiciously like a new entrant at the zoo.
“OK. Take it easy on those pills,” she counselled as she left
I was wide awake now and about to get out of bed when my eye fell to the object still clutched in my hand. It was a black coloured can with the Thums Up logo on it with the words:
‘Thums Up Charged. With Extra Thunder’ printed on it.
Last thing I remember is the sound of a loud thud as I dizzily plopped to the floor- face down.
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